Did you know that your brain is constantly listening to what you tell it? Every single day, nearly
100,000 messages flood your brain. That’s a LOT of information! To keep things manageable,
your brain has to make choices—it decides what to focus on and what to ignore. And guess
who’s in charge of what your brain notices? You are.
Why Your Thoughts Matter
Let’s say you tell yourself, “I’m not smart” or “People are judging me for my acne.” Whether
it’s true or not, your brain starts looking for signs to back up what you believe. It might notice
when you struggle with a homework problem or catch someone glancing your way, and
suddenly, you feel like your thoughts are confirmed.
But here’s the secret: this works both ways. If you train your brain to look for the good—your
strengths, your wins, the kind gestures of others—it will start to notice those things instead.
Your Brain is Like a Detective
Think of your brain as a detective that’s always gathering evidence. If you give it a case like
“I’m not good enough,” it will search for proof to support that claim. On the flip side, if you tell
it, “I’m capable and strong,” your brain will start finding examples that back you up.
The thoughts you allow to stick around shape the way you see yourself and the world. Over time,
these repeated thoughts can turn into core beliefs—ideas so deeply rooted that they feel like
undeniable truths. That’s why it’s so important to be careful about the stories you tell yourself.
Don’t Believe Everything You Think
Here’s a truth bomb: not every thought that pops into your head is true. Your brain can be
influenced by emotions, insecurities, and even what you’ve been taught or heard from others.
The good news is that you have the power to challenge your thoughts. Here’s how:
Notice Your Thoughts
Pay attention to what you’re telling yourself. Are your thoughts positive, neutral,
or negative?
Ask Questions
When you catch a negative thought, ask yourself:
Is this really true?
What’s the evidence for and against this thought?
Would I say this to my best friend?
Flip the Script
Replace negative thoughts with something kinder or more empowering. For
example, change “I’m so bad at this” to “I’m learning and improving every day.”
The Power of Focus
At one of my recent youth conferences, we did an activity to show how powerful focus can be.
When you tell your brain to look for something—like the color red—it will start noticing all the
red objects around you. The same is true for your thoughts. If you train your brain to look for the
good, it will find the good.
It’s not easy. Changing your thought patterns takes practice, and some days will be harder than
others. But it’s worth it because you have more control than you realize.
Be the Best Boss to Your Brain
Think of your brain as an employee, and you’re the boss. Your brain will follow the instructions
you give it, so make those instructions count.
When you think, “I’m ugly,” stop and say, “Wait a second—that’s not true.” Remind yourself of
the things that make you unique and beautiful, inside and out.
When you think, “I’ll never be good at this,” reframe it: “I’m working hard, and I’m getting
better every day.”
The more you challenge negative thoughts and focus on the positive, the stronger your self-belief
will become.
If you liked this blog and would like to meet with Melanie to work on this, discover our services below.
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